I have a small treasure, hidden deep inside my drawer. But it's not something that is really valuable and expensive, it's a small heart shaped locket painted in gold. The locket is a bit bigger than 500 Korean won coin, and had a flower carved on the surface. Inside the locket there was a mirror and a place to put in a tiny picture. I got this as a gift from two of my friends, who were sisters, as a pledge of friendship. I met these girls when I moved to Busan in elementary school. Our fathers had the same profession, and we lived in the same apartment, and we had similar hobbies. Because we had a lot in common, we were soon very close. But both my family and their family had to move to different cities after a year. Before I moved away, they gave me this locket so I wouldn't forget them. We put in a small memo inside, which had our names written on it. The locket also had a gold chain so I used to wear it wherever I went. However, the chain snapped and it disappeared. My friends and I still keep in touch once in a while. We are close as we always were, although we haven't seen each other for years. Every month or so when I clean my desk drawers, I open the box I kept the locket and our letters in and look at it for hours. The locket is soaked with my memories of me and my friends. That's why I treasure this locket. I am treasuring my beautiful memories.
Hi Kahee! This is Wansoo cho. I'm really envy you having such a priceless gift from your friends. And My Feedback is as follow
ReplyDeleteI think Your writting all satisfy Q1,2,3,4,5. I can't find something to correct. But the sentence'...open the box I kept the locket and our letters in and look at it for hours.' in ther 3rd line from bellow seems a little bit ambiguous. I hope you more clarify this sentence.
see you later!
I have a small treasure, hidden deep inside my drawer. But it's not something that is really valuable and expensive, it’s a small heart shaped locket painted in gold. The locket is a bit bigger than 500 Korean won coin, and had a flower carved on the surface. Inside the locket there was a mirror and a place to put in a tiny picture. I got this as a gift from two of my friends, who were sisters, as a pledge of friendship. I met these girls when I moved to Busan in elementary school. Our fathers had the same profession, and we lived in the same apartment, and we had similar hobbies. Because we had a lot in common, we were soon very close. But both my family and their family had to move to different cities after a year. Before I moved away, they gave me this locket so I wouldn't forget them. We put in a small memo inside, which had our names written on it. The locket also had a gold chain so I used to wear it wherever I went. However, the chain snapped and it disappeared. We still kept in touch after we moved to different cities. We kept sending letters and after we bought mobile phones we kept in touch by mail. We are close as we always were, although we haven't seen each other for years. Now I keep the locket and the letters they sent me in a pretty blue box and store it in one of my drawers. Every month when I do a big cleanup of my room, I open the box and look at my treasure. The locket is filled with the memories of me and my friends. It reminds me of all the fun we had when we were kids, which makes it one of my most precious belongings.
ReplyDeleteI fixed the last part of my paragraph using the comment, thanks!