It was September, 2008 that I ran in to the Arabic language. Preparing for the Korean Scholastic Aptitude Test, I was reviewing my test paper for the trial examination and inadvertently looked at Arabic section. Strange letters filled in all over the papers seemed so difficult to read and understand, but meanwhile they were intriguing. Since I had loved learning new languages from an early age, I decided to start a new adventure by studying Arabic. In that time, there was no high school that offers regular courses for it and I also couldn't find any private institute teaching Arabic. Due to this, I tried hard studying it by myself watching educational broadcasting channel which was the only way that I could get basic knowledge about Arabic. Two months later, I got a perfect score on the Korean SAT, and made my own decision to major in it. Until now, it has been a good friend of mine and I am planning to go on to the graduate school of Interpretation and Translation for further study.
Hi, SunGyung! This is Jae-Hun Lee. And I'll give some feedback on your writing.
ReplyDelete1. What I like the most about your writing is that whole paragraph has a unity. You describe why you choose Arabic and how you're studying Arabic.
2. Your main point seems to be why you choose to learn Arabic. "Since I had loved learning new languages from an early age, I decided to start a new adventure by studying Arabic." I think this sentence is the main point in this paragraph.
3. I like this paragraph explains how you're studying Arabic from the basic. that point is impressive for me.
Thanks and see you tomorrow~
Hi, Sungyung! I am Yeonju. I enjoyed reading your paragragh. Thank you.
DeleteYou wrote how you started to study arabic, how you studied for yourself and what you plan to do in the near future.
I think, your paragrach has unity. It seems, there is not a sentence that is out of the main topic; your studying arabic. It is good, but, in my opinion, this paragragh is obsessed with keeping unity. I mean, I understand that this paragraph is telling how you have been studying arabic so far, but it doesn't really cover your life so far.
Another weakpoint is that there is neither a topic sentence nor a conclusing sentence. Just adding a sentence that tells the meaning of studying arabic in your life until now or so at the front of it will make this paragragh more complete.
Thank you!
SunGyung Kim/ My life until now - 2nd draft
DeleteArabic, my destiny !
I still remember the first moment that I decided to major in Arabic. It was September, 2008 that I ran in to the Arabic language. Preparing for the Korean Scholastic Aptitude Test, I was reviewing my test paper for the trial examination and inadvertently looked at Arabic section. Strange letters filled in all over the papers seemed so difficult to read and understand, but meanwhile they were intriguing. Since I had loved learning new languages from an early age, I decided to start a new adventure by studying Arabic. In that time, there was no high school that offers regular courses for it and I also couldn't find any private institute teaching Arabic. Due to this, I tried hard studying Arabic by myself watching educational broadcasting channel which was the only way that I could get basic knowledge about it. Two months later, I got a perfect score on the Korean SAT, and made my own decision to major in it. Until now, it has been a good friend of mine and I am planning to go on to the graduate school of Interpretation and Translation for further study. Though after a long time in the future, I will never forget the moment that I was strongly attracted by Arabic and give my affection during my whole life.