My life until today
Nothing impossible.
I have gone through many challenges until today. In my childhood, I had been majoring in Korean traditional dance. I loved my dance, and I thought I could be a prima donna on the stage. However with a unexpected accident, I had no choice but to give it up. For me, quitting dancing meant living in vain. After I transferred the high school from art specialty school into a normal high school, I could have not started again for 2 years. With endless console and support from my family, I finally succeed to restart. I studied from the bottom. As a result, I could enter the Sung Shin Women's university. My first major was geography which I chose with my score, not my interest. After 2 years I decided to change my college and major. To transfer college was harder than enter the college. From this effort, I learned how to lower myself. the reason was that when I was majoring in dance, I was so confident with my own ability and I was overconfident in myself to do everything. However, it was not true. In life, there surely exist what I cannot do and this can only be solved with huge effort. Now I am who I have been made from great ordeal. Whenever I got weary and faced a new challenge, I always let me remind that because I have gone through so hard challenges, I will be able to go through this challenge too.
Hi NaRae ! This is SunGyung Kim and thanks for your wonderful paragraph about the life until now.
ReplyDeleteYour writing seems strong because the topic sentence is lucid. This makes the main point which says that you overcame many challenges in your life and you will also be able to handle another one later thanks to those experiences lucid. I also really like your vocabularies and expressions such as 'living in vain' and 'ordeal' because I didn't know how to adapt them to my writing until I read your paragraph. But the sentence "I had to lower myself." seems little awkward since it doesn't go well in English. I think there are not any critical change you have to make, and glad to comment on your wonderful life story.
See you soon in class :)
Hi this is Wansoo Cho And I read your post with great interest.
ReplyDeleteActually the phrase 'Nothing impossible' catch my eyes and I think it is really great. But on top of the former comment, the expression 'normal high school' is a little bit unnatural. I know what you're willing to mean but ,as you know, the antonym of normal is 'abnormal'. So if you say 'normal high school' then the other school become 'abnormal high school'. So I think you'd better use 'public school' or sth like that instead of that. except for that, overal writting was good and i'm really happy to have a comment on your post!
see you on monday and have a great weekends!
Hi, this is ChaiHyun Nah from your monday writing class!:)
ReplyDeleteWhat I like about this piece of writing is that it really stays together. Your title fits perfectly with the content.
However, I think that "I learned how to lower myself" part does not go well with the other, because you are talking about nothing is impossible with a great amount of effort in other part of your essay.
Nice work, and see you on Monday!
Nothing impossible.
ReplyDeleteI have gone through many challenges until today. In my childhood, I had been majoring in Korean traditional dance. I loved my dance, and I thought I could be a prima donna on the stage. However with a unexpected accident, I had no choice but to give it up. For me, quitting dancing meant living in vain. After I transferred from the high school from art specialty school into a public high school, I could have not started again for 2 years. since everything around me had been changed. I needed the time to adjust with things totally new. With endless console and support from my family, I could finally succeeded to restart. I studied from the bottom. As a result, I got enter the Sung Shin Women's university. My first major was geography which I chose with my score, not my interest. After 2 years I decided to change my college and major. To transfer college was harder than enter the college. From this effort, I learned how to be humble. The reason was that when I was majoring in dance, I was so confident with my own ability and I was overly trust myself to do everything. However, it was not true. In life, there surely exist what I cannot do and this can only be solved with huge effort. Now I am who I have been made from great ordeal. Whenever I got weary and faced a new challenge, I always let me remind that because I have gone through so hard challenges, I will be able to go through this challenge too.