The best job for me
Although my parents say the best job is the highest salary job, I want something different than money from my future job. First, I want a job where I can use my academic knowledge. I studied English, Russian, French, foreign literature, devoting my whole college life to it. Why did I? Because I believe it helps me to be a useful person in the society: my family, my school, my country, and humanbeing. I don't want to abandon my agile academic sense, chosing a job, not related to my mojor and my interest. I hope to work in the foreign literature and art field, as a translator or teacher, so that I can adapt what I've learned and studied. Second, I think a job should give me enough free time to enjoy my life. A job is just a part of my life, not my life as a whole. I need spare time to relax, read interesting books or magazines, see films, meet friends, travel, and go swimming. To satisfy my desire, I found I shouldn't work more than four days a week and leave from the work at six in every evening. Since I know well it is hard to get a job with that condition, I am thinking about working as a freelancer. Third, I want a job where there is a good boss. I think a good boss is a person who has higher competence than me, so he or she can teach me how to work well. Since I have several experiences working under stupid managers, I found meeting a smart and competent boss is crucial in working life. I don't want a person who bothers me with their mistakes and clumsiness as my boss. I want a boss who are perfectly professional, so he or she can be a role model in my career. Likewise, I want to get a job, that I can use my knowledge, gives enough spare time and where I can work under a good boss.
HI! I am Kim you jin. this is your comment.
ReplyDeleteyou write well about your experience, your boss that bothered you by his mistakes. thanks to this sentence, i can understand what you want when choosing a job. however i think if you add some specific informations, it will be better. it is your opinion pragraph, so the most important thing is how well you insisit your opinion. however, only your opinions are not sufficient. it does rather need something more detailed which can help your writing reliable.
for example, you can use poll that is conducted fof recognization of people about good job.
thank you!! see you
I enjoyed your constructive writing.
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing to pick out.
So there is no reason to squeeze in order to comment.
Your ideas on the ideal job are so agreeable.
and the formation of your writing is also fine.
Thanks.
Hello, this is Dana Eun from your class and here is my comment on your paragraph.
ReplyDeleteWhat I liked about your writing is that it is very well organized and the supportings are very well explained. I liked the way you listed the conditions you want to have for your future job. It was easy to read and understand.
THere wasn't any part that I couldn't understand or wasn't clear to me.Your supportings were good and the argument was persuasive.
I liked the part where you wrote "Why did I? Because I believe it helps me to be a useful person in the society". It struck me strong because I always thought the same way and agree with you. It expresses your strong opinion about the studies and jobs.
One thing that you can do to make your paragraph much better is to decide a specific job. You mentioned several jobs in your paragraph, teacher, translator, etc. I understood that you want to work in a certain field, but it would be better if you chose one job. It would make your paragraph much stronger and straight to the point.
Nice writing and thanks for sharing it. see you in class:)!