Look on the bright side!
I am an optimistic person. First, I always try to look on the good and better side of the problem. Though some things might not go in the way I intended, rather than getting angry or blaming it to some other person or thing, I try to find the second best alternative solution. In that way, I can be less stressed and also make less stress on other people. Second, I also try to be patient. I am the one who tries to be calm and not to be impatient. There are some people, who gets too pushy when they try to make their own goal. I used to be like that, but I changed my personality through many trials and errors. For example, when I was in high school, everyone in my class were anxious and got stressed about getting the good grades and entering the good university, as a student I was worried either but I tried to make my classmates feel better and calm in the way I did. Sometimes, I got too optimistic about things and get into trouble sometimes, but most of the time the optimistic personality leads me and people around me in a good way.
I thought I uploaded the post on thursday correctly
ReplyDeletebut I think there was a problem during the mailing
Hello I'm Wansoo Cho. I'm gonna give you a comment without preamble.
ReplyDeleteActually I think your writting is lack of sepecific example. It would be better include sepecific example about 'Though some things might not go in the way I intended, rather than getting angry or blaming it to some other person or thing, I try to find the second best alternative solution. In that way, I can be less stressed and also make less stress on other people.'. Also 'Sometimes, I got too optimistic about things and get into trouble sometimes, but most of the time the optimistic personality leads me and people around me in a good way.'this sentence is also vague. Because when explaining one's personality tend to be abstract, adding sepecific experience or example is necessary I think.
Good luck to your revising work@
Hello, this is Dana from your class! I read your writing with interest. I think it is very good to be optimistic :)
ReplyDeleteWhat I like about your writing is that it is very simple and easy to read. There wasn't any part that I couldn't understand.
Your main point of the paragraph seems to be your personality-how much optimistic your are.
I like the part where you said "I try to find the second best alternative solution." because it shows that you try to have a positive point of view to make things get better in times of failure.
There wasn't any part that I couldn't understand clearly. Your vocabularies were pretty simple.
The one thing that you can do to improve your paragraph would be adding more details and specific examples. How did you manage to make your classmates feel better? When did you think of an alternative solution that helped you?
Your paragraph has a title and the topic sentence. Also your concluding sentence restates the topic sentence. That was good.
Thanks for sharing your writing and see you in class!