My best counselor
Actually, She is not a doctor. But she is really a good doctor for me in the sense she makes me feel comfortable.
She loves children and also English. She is full of passion and energy. So whever I meet her, I'm impressed and thankful for her.
Can you guess who she is? She is my high school English teacher. In fact, she hadn't taught me during high school years, but I met her by chance after graduation
thanks to my friend. Now we get together every semester and have an honest talk everytime. From girl friend issue to my career, she gives me helpful advice sincerely.
That alone can't solve my worries and also I don't expect from her to solve my problems. Just listening to me makes me relieved.
In that sense she is a good physician for me as well as the best mentor.
Hi, it's Ji-young from the writing class. First, I was impressed that you still keep in touch with your high school teacher who didn't even teach you. Well, that is good for you.
ReplyDeleteWhat I like about this piece of writing is that you gave us an example of a good physician with another definition. I also like that you started with pronouns so I feel curious who she was.
Your main point seems to be that your english teacher is a good physician as well as a mentor.
And I thought the word sincerely was powerful. Because you wrote it in bold strokes and in that sentence, it seems to be important word that can show the relationship with you and your teacher.
But there are some words that isn't clear enough. For example, the word 'that alone', I know what you mean but it seems little bit awkward. And at the part 'have an honest talk everytime', I think the word 'everytime' needs to be fixed like 'everytime we meet'. That would be much clearer.
The one change you could make that would make the biggest improvement in this piece of writing is writing longer with more details. I think you can give us details like how you met your teacher after graduation.
Then, see you in class.
Hi this is ChaiHyeon Nah from your monday morning writing class.
ReplyDeleteIn your writing, I could understand your main point and what you wanted to emphasize the most-- about your best mentor, your highschool English teacher. It is well described but I still believe that it will be even better if you put more details about her. You've mentioned some topics that you talk with her. However I think that is not enough; you could tell us one or two episodes and that mihgt have helped us to understand your best physian more.
Thank you and see you on Monday.